Something I noticed in her recent Esquire interview:

I would always tell somebody if they had shit on their face. Especially if it’s really feces.

So just remember, people… if you give your partner a covert Dirty Sanchez, don’t drop by Seyfried’s house afterward. She will totally ruin the surprise.

(And by “people”, yes, I’m referring specifically to Ray J and R Kelly. Don’t anyone try to convince me that at least one of them hasn’t smeared shit on somebody in the heat of videotaped passion… it’s just not plausible.)