Don’t worry; I’ll just do it over the scars that resulted from the Seven Pounds incident…. Continue Reading
A Bastion of Bacchanalian Booyah
Tag Archives: music
Guitar Heroine: The Greatest Musical Instrument Sex Video Ever (NSFW)
WARNING: This video depicts fictional sexual violence. A non-consenting guitar is fondled, thrown forcibly on to a bed, ravaged, and then thrown away like so much refuse. Please remember, kids: not being able to say no, means no…. Continue Reading
22 Random Things I Thought While Enduring The VMAs
SAMPLE: “I’m pretty sure that if the CDC could get a sample of that Jersey Shore/Chelsea Handler hot tub water, we’d have a fair shot at developing a vaccine for every venereal disease that ever existed.”… Continue Reading
Miley “Can’t Be Tamed”, Might Require Cattle Prod
You know what else can’t be tamed, ladies? That’s right. BEARS!… Continue Reading
Cheryl Cole, Inexplicably Covered In Cobwebs
The line between arty photography and a lack of proper housecleaning can be a fine one…. Continue Reading
Storm Large’s ‘Eight Miles Wide’: Best Song of 2009, or Best Song Ever?
This song is so good, you’ll be singing it around the office. And then getting fired for it. (Unless you work at a whorehouse, in which case, are they hiring?)… Continue Reading
Saturday’s Links Are… Judeish!
Arnie tells off his legislature the same way I told off my 10th grade history teacher, dogs is good eatin’, and the Beatles are finally exposed…. Continue Reading
Okay, Beyoncé… You’re Forgiven
Pop stars can do the kindest things when they’re not busy making you feel like a discarded chunk of love-gristle on the resplendent plate of romance…. Continue Reading
They Don’t Make Teen Sexpots Like They Used To
Pixie Lott is letting down the team. And not much else, dammit…. Continue Reading
Wednesday’s Links Are… Rockin’ Out!
PG gay porn, the glory of air guitar, and our nation’s responsible media at work…. Continue Reading