It’s about time I hired someone. My apartment smells like old frozen dinners and shame…. Continue Reading
It’s about time I hired someone. My apartment smells like old frozen dinners and shame…. Continue Reading
In related news, my pants are suddenly tighter. Or would be, if I were wearing pants. Which I’m not, because, you know… the heat…. Continue Reading
Bet ya didn’t think you’d see “Helen Mirren” and “NSFW” together, did ya? Never underestimate me, my friends…. Continue Reading
You need proof? They cut the money shot scene out of Mr. Holland’s Opus…. Continue Reading
I firmly believe that Cosmopolitan magazine hates our freedom…. Continue Reading
Every sperm is sacred, every sperm is yummy. Every sperm is needed, on this singer’s tummy…. Continue Reading
Another selection from my personal stash of tits an– er, collection of beach life tableaux…. Continue Reading
And verily, her blessings were ample!… Continue Reading
And I, in turn, am not ruling out Audrina Partridge movies…. Continue Reading
And you thought Schoolhouse Rock made learning fun? Behold my works, ye mighty, and tremble!… Continue Reading