By Roger on August 25, 2009
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Oh man, if this were 1995, I would be so stoked right now! Also, I would be rethinking the Beanie Babies market.
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Don’t say I never did you a favor, ladies. And don’t say I never satisfied you, because we both know that’s a lie.
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Well, I’m stunned.
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I’m not sure I’d call Jessica scrawny, really. Not in these shots, anyway. Rather than look at a woman like this and see the cups half-empty, I prefer to think of her as “easily maneuverable”. Like a 10-speed with a vagina.
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These kids today, man, they’re fucked up. Bears in lingerie? Sheesh. You remember the good old days, when we just stuck gerbils up our asses and were thankful for the opportunity?
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All of the best ideas in life can be summed up in three words. Don’t believe me? “Jessica Alba naked”, “french fried bacon”, “hairless nut sac” … okay, maybe the last one is just me.
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If one of the cars from Mad Max mated with\ a kitchen supply store, you’d get something like this, only with an Australian accent.
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Author Bio: A philosopher-king in exile, Roger has been forced by fate to wander the wilderness in pursuit of good Italian food and a sort of ring-like thingie –passed down to him by a sacred order of sexy, amoral executive assistants and stolen by this chick he met at a party, he thinks her name was “M”-something– that is possessed of a power that can shake the very foundations of the globe. Except that globes don’t have foundations, so he mostly just checks out hot chicks and cultivates a Lebowski-eqsue lifestyle.
Mmm, shitless guy is for me, right?
Mehcad is HOT.