Nice Tweets: @kayden_kross

Twitter is a transformative technology that allows individuals to project their ideas and experiences into the mediastream without the filter of conventional journalism. Unlike traditional blogging, it is immediate and demands an economical use of words that doesn’t punish non-writers. Unlike Facebook, it is targeted broadcasting, without the mutual “friending” and two-way awareness implied in such systems.

It is also where hot people hang out, posting hot shit.

Our first entry in Nice Tweets is porn star Kayden Kross, who is probably the most articulate on-camera person working in her industry. (Which sounds like standard, condescending “no, seriously, she’s bright!” bullshit, but is nonetheless true.) She doesn’t do much in terms of candid photo posting or yakking about sex, but if you’re into witty chicks who look like this:

…then she’s a winner.

Unfortunately, Kayden isn’t into me, which means she has no one to help look after her ambiguously-sexed and routinely destructive rabbit, Sammy, nor a loyal helper to give her the kind of foot-rubs that didn’t get Tony Rocky Horror thrown out Marcellus Wallace’s window. The woman is a reckless fool who will rue the day she ignored my plaintive requests to worship her body and soul. Yes indeed, she shall be enrued!

Here’s a random sampling of KK’s tweetstream:

Another mainstream set and they just had to explain to the other girls what POV means. Porn has prepared me for the world.

I’m trying to convince my sister that boys’ feelings should be left as intact as you found them. I’m sensing an air of disbelief.

@brettholz I’ve found that the only way to get my number anymore is to fuck me first. It’s how I weed out the sales calls (:

First text I got this morning: “OMG I just watched you pee in HD”. we’re off to a good start.

I think I melted a dildo. Don’t leave those things in the sun. Same goes for wax candles. This is my domestic advice.

Quickly learning that the problem with dark sunglasses is it’s that much harder to communicate to chatty strangers that you’re ignoring them

I’m reading American Gods. A hooker just ate a man with her vagina. Now I’m not going to be able to put it down until I find out why.

For the record- monkfish liver tastes like wet cat food. Just keep that in mind next time you get adventurous at the sushi bar.

I just realized everyone asked how I know what wet cat food tastes like… I took double dog dares very seriously as a child…

The photographer is making me play with switchblades. This must be the bad gut feeling that everyone tells me to listen to.